Ideas and Identity

Ideas and Identity     

Have you ever seen a group of smart people together? Often it seems that there is a general lack of comfort. I think this has to do with their sense of identity being violated. They are used to being the smartest person in the room and this position has become a part of who they are. So when someone comes across as being even smarter than them or knowing more about what they consider to be THEIR subject of expertise, they seem off-put. I wonder if this has any carry-over to less desirable traits. Before proceeding, allow me to state that this is speculation, and I have no desire to accuse anyone of being lazy or weak-willed. Now then. For example, having insomnia is, as I understand it, a pretty big pain in the neck. But how many times have your insomniac friends brought it up to you? Quite a lot? This isn’t really surprising, since it is something that they probably deal with on a regular basis and is therefore often in the forefront of their mind, but I think it’s common that difficulties like these aren’t treated strictly as problems. They also take on a personal significance. It is part of who they are, and the idea of being freed from it, while sounding relieving, sounds a bit unnerving. If you think of yourself in part as someone who doesn’t sleep well, then it would be like there is a hole if that part of you were removed. Again, I could be completely missing the mark here. But maybe this can apply even further down the rabbit hole, even down to things like morality and belief. I’ve met no shortage of people who, on a fundamental level, make little sense to me. I just can’t grasp how they can live life based on the premise that they use, or how they can be satisfied by theoretical eloquence, even if in reality the functionality of their lifestyle doesn’t measure up at all. But ideas and beliefs become personal on some level. Sure, people might know that they have an outlook or way of applying said outlook that is flawed, but it is still theirs. They would rather have an arguably flawed idea to call their own than to just accept someone else’s. There is something deeply satisfying about crafting something to call your own, and in a cultural as individual-focused as ours, what the other guy has going just doesn’t matter all that much.

On True Love

I observe that there is a belief common to most in the world that I know (an admittedly small scope) that there is this thing called True Love, that one day you will find the perfect person to be with. While it is not my wish to be cynical of such a poetic dream, I believe that this is misguided.


The concept of true love appears to me to spring from the same place as horoscopes. While they might sound true on the surface (especially to the relationally and spiritually hungry, respectively), virtually any in-depth analysis reveals an illogical and unfounded core.


Consider true love from the theistic view point. Without going into the varying details, it is common among the major theistic worldviews that how things are today is not how things are intended to be, that there has been a departure from normativity, and that as a result of this, every component of life has been twisted and wounded. Yet the longing is still there. Supposing that the view of love today is a social construction, even it has its origins in some deep longing of the heart. Perhaps this longing for and expecting perfect love is a remnant of normativity that has endured. If there was a plan for individuals to find their ideal counter-part, it has long been altered. Perhaps ideal and complete human couples could operate together in perfect harmony, but that state is gone. We are been changed. The word 'denatured' comes to mind, referring to changes in proteins due to non-ideal variations in temperature and pH. Even the slightest changes in structure keep the protein from performing its function. That is not to say that there are no plans for peoples' lives together now, but that we are twisted creatures with twisted hearts living in a twisted world. 


In the strictly naturalistic mindset, the notion of true love should not even enter into serious thinking.

Escapism

I have been thinking about escapism lately. As far as I can tell, we are up to our ears in it. In virtually every story-telling medium employed today, whether movies, music, books, or some other innovation, escapist fiction is far more popular than true-to-life experiential stories. This disproportionate dispensation has and will continue to redefine ourselves on a fundamental, moral level. I would like to specifically look at how the area of special relationships has been affected.


It is not difficult to find stories which revolve around a person's stronger-than-normal relationship to another. I suppose this makes sense, as it becomes a chief concern in someone's mind (usually) rather early in one's young adulthood and persists for many years. But it seems that when we look for answers about how to handle these things, we don't get very many good answers. What is perhaps the most confusing and personally important aspects of our lives seems devoid of help. Instead of getting stories about real relationships, we get canned, cliched tales of magic fairy-dust. We aren't told about how hard you have to work at a relationship to build it up and make it strong. About the sacrifice involved. About the sheer grit you need to slog your way through the relational winters. How to balance the most important human-human relationship in one's life with other duties, friendships, and obligations.


Now, most of us aren't idiots. We know whether we are being served something fantastic or factual. But knowing a few examples of what is fiction doesn't really help us determine what is fact. We're still left with nothing to hang onto. And so we venture out on our own, trying to feel our way through this minefield, hoping to not get ourselves too mangled before reaching something.


Perhaps this is a cultural crying-out in dissatisfaction. Whatever way most people seem to be searching for love doesn't work well. If the rates of failed marriages are anything to go by (I assume that they are), something isn't right. Maybe people don't have "the right stuff" for the relationship to survive anymore. If that is the case, then we need to consider what our predecessors had going for them that we don't. Or maybe it is closer to what I stated above, and it is that people don't know what to expect anymore and perhaps dive into the whole ordeal recklessly or with unreal expectations. So then people become dissatisfied, which makes escapism a more popular form of passing the time, letting people get away from their unhappy reality. And if demand for escapism increases, then more will be produced, swamping out the true stories even more. This will further ensure that people will not know what to expect. See the spiral?


But perhaps there is reason to be hopeful. The very thing driving this cycle of disappointment is potentially our way out of it. When faced with the dissatisfaction of a failing relationship, we have a few options. We can ignore it, as our stoic predecessors may have done. While things may look fine on the surface, there is much that is being poisoned and missed out on. Or we can take the most popular course of action today and try to escape it. While escaping can make the pain go away for a little while, it only makes things worse, further skewing expectations for the next generation. Or we can take this dissatisfaction and let it motivate us to find out how to make it work. Facing our problems and dealing with them appropriately is never as easy or fun or happiness-inducing as running from them, but we will all be better for it, ourselves, our spouses, our families, our communities, our cultures.


TL;DR
Escapism drowns out true stories, making it harder to deal with reality, especially special relationships.

Here's a thing from a while ago. It was originally posted to my Facebook account, with each part of the plant "tagged".


(Behold, the glory of Paint!)


Our lives are brilliantly reflected in plants.


Fruit: We all want things, things we consider important, things that may or may not be tangible. You might want a well-paying job, a stable family, a sense of purpose. These things are fruit.


Stem:Just like fruit doesn't appear on it's own, what we want won't manifest just because we want it. The fruit needs to be attached to a stem, a plan that moves resources to where they are needed.


Roots: But the stem useless without roots. Roots absorb water and nutrients, things that the plant needs that it cannot produce on its own. At the core of the root structure is the taproot: all other parts of the root emanate from the tap root. This is what you hold to be truth. This defines the rest of your life. Spreading out from the tap root are lateral roots. While the tap root is the most important root, lateral roots are essential. You need to expand your knowledge of what you are taking root in. The more you understand your soil, the more you can glean from it.


Soil: Even with the best root system ever devised, however, roots mean nothing if you aren't rooted in something strong. Soil needs to be both stable and nutritious. If not, the plant is liable to fall and starve. You need to be rooted in something that is solid and does not fade away, and in something that provides you with knowledge, hope, and other intangible things.


Water: Plants also need water, if they are to flourish and produce fruit. Water represents material things. We all have physical needs. We need food to be able to function, we need a way to stay warm and safe, we need money to buy most of the things we need. But just like with water, you need to have the correct amount of things. Too few, and you simply won't have the capacity to produce fruit. Too much, and your foundation will be weakened, and you won't have access to the nutrients you need just as badly.


Wind: Wind is the trials we experience. It both makes life uncomfortable and is absolutely critical to success. While wind does not exist to test the plant's foundation, it certainly does test it. Also, as the wind beats against the plant, the plant will react (in a way) by strengthening itself, so that it can better endure the wind in the future. It is the same with us. While the trials we face generally don't arise or exist for the sole purpose of our destruction, they still test you. If you are rooted strongly enough and are getting the nutrients you need, you will be able to endure the trials, and will be stronger for it.


Sunlight/Leaves: The key to photosynthesis is sunlight. It provides the energy for the plant to produce sugar. In our lives, it is some kind of negative thing in our life, something we want to change in the world, something that makes you angry. Although the sun beats down on you, and is at times almost unbearable, without it, you would have no drive to produce fruit, nothing to push you to be better. But you need leaves in order to use sunlight. You have to be willing to absorb this thing that drives you. A plant without leaves can do nothing with sunlight except be scorched by it.


Flower: But fruit doesn't come from the stem or leaves or roots (in this illustration, at least). Fruit is the product of a flower. Flowers are dormant ideas, things that could become something that haven't experienced the right trigger event.


Stamen: Pollen comes from the stamen, and is used to fertilize flowers. Pollen is the sharing of information, be it in the form of actions, words, or chaos-theory like wisps of thoughts or emotion. Pollen is borne on the winds of circumstance, or by insects or birds, the unwitting carriers of this information. Pollen can come from the stamen of other plants, or from the same plant, depending on what the wind and carriers give access to.


Pistil: The pistil is what receives the pollen, guiding it down to the unfertilized egg. You can have all the ideas in the world thrown at you, but if you aren't open to them and willing to contemplate them, you will not have fruit. When you observe the affairs of the world, you can evaluate which things are best. Once your observations fertilize the seed, you will have an idea of what you want your life to look like and produce. Thus, fruit begins to grow, assuming it is properly connected.


We have come full circle.


Addition:
Plants also reflect how compromise should look in our lives.  As a plant grows, it will adjust it's shape to have the best access to sunlight possible.  Also, plants change shape in response to the wind, strengthening certain cells to better resist the effects of wind.  But the plant cannot compromise the integrity it's roots.  To do so would weaken the foundation.  In us, this is seen as a willingness to compromise with our plans (stem) as trials (wind) make us stronger or as what drives us (leaves and sunlight) becomes more and less apparent and clear to us, but as an utter refusal to compromise on principals, on things that every part of your life rests upon.  Mess with the stem a bit, the plant can still produce fruit.  Mess with the roots, and the whole plant gets pulled out of the ground.

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